How to feel like an androgynous oxbridge lit student
Fashion: invest in a tweed blazer, a secondhand slightly ratty one is better, one with elbow patches is best of all. A white or ivory fisherman’s sweater for days lounging in the common room/library/your lover’s lap while punting down the river, this should be paired with soft brown or light tweed trousers and brown oxfords for the best effect. Invest also in a grey or black blazer and trousers in black/brown/grey. These are your wardrobe staples now, you want to look like you’ve slept in the library and revived yourself with some sort of narcotic at all times. Some good waistcoats in the same colours won’t go amiss. Cardigans and sweater vests in muted colours like green, burgundy and caramel. Find some ties in secondhand shops with whimsical patterns on them, preferably in colours like mustard, heritage green and blood red. You’re going to need a long black or camel coat and a decent long scarf you can wrap several times around your neck in the perpetual autumn chill. You may also need a dinner suit for a) college balls or b) secret meetings of a literary and murder club you and your friends form in the first term.
Details: battered leather satchel is a must. You can also carry around stacks of old books - preferably poetry or classics. Get a fountain pen and practice writing in cursive. If you don’t actually need glasses you can get yourself a false pair, preferably ones with a tortoiseshell frame or else a black 50’s style frame. Your hair should be artfully tousled, some good medium hold hair wax is good for this. If you’re going to wear makeup then stick to a natural look, brown mascara, boyish brows, a little bit of pink blusher to simulate a flush brought on by a chill wind, clear or rose coloured lip balm.
Perfume: Habit Rouge - Guerlain. Chergui - Serge Lutens. Élixir Charnel Gourmand Coquin - Guerlain. Hypnotic Poison - Dior. Black Opium - YSL.
Character details: you should quote a lot of poetry from dead authors, especially Oscar Wilde, Byron, Keats and any of the Greek poets and playwrights. You should also write your own prose or poetry in a battered old notebook and then show this to your friends from the literary and murder club. Listen to artists like the Smiths, the National and Radiohead. Drink coffee frequently and try to do it in small but comfortable cafés or else the library at night. Don’t forget to also be as hedonistic as possible, drink champagne at all opportunities, host or attend elaborate dinner parties with several courses and copious amounts of alcohol. Form an unrequited and idolatrous passion for your best friend. You should try and be as analog as possible, reject modern technology in favour of letter writing, wrist watches, wind up alarm clocks and plays on the radio. Your main form of entertainment should be reflecting on the fleeting nature of youth and happiness with your friends in the literary and murder club.
